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Worst Class in the WoW

In reality we all know that most of these things we think about other classes cannot be even mostly true. If that were the case then all of our raids would be comprised of one class. My wife at this point is directing my attention to the old school video of 40 druids taking down Onyxia, in an attempt to show me that indeed her class is and always has been far superior to my own.

Warlocks
Congratulations! You are probably one of the least sucky classes out there. Very little seems to be wrong with your class and for the most part most Warlocks seem to be rather competent. Too bad you won’t be topping the damage meters in a raid. To help make up for this, don’t forget your bag full of Soul Shards to be the raid’s own personal taxi service, that’s half of the reason they bring you along. Oh, and keep life tapping while you’re already low health and taking massive damage, because that’s totally the smart thing to do.

Mages
Wimpy glass cannons covered in cloth that want to be Warlocks. You are usually dead, or begging for Vigilance because apparently you have some serious aggro management issues. Healers and Tanks hate your Mirror Images, they can’t just fade out, or poof in a bubble of smoke. That would be too easy, so instead they sound exactly like a real mage dying, making the Healers and Tanks have a small heart attack each time. GG. But we all know the real reason Mages are brought to raids. Two words; Strudel and Portals. There is a reason you never hear “Oh we don’t have a mage in the raid for their amazing DPS!”, instead you hear “Crap we don’t have any water!”.

Priests
Shadows Priests are always on the short end of the stick damage wise, never quite on the same level as Warlocks and Mages. To make up for this Blizzard has made them walking, talking Healing Stream/Mana Spring totems with more health. I think this is probably why Shadow Priests feel the need to occasionally off themselves with some well placed Shadow Word: Deaths. Who can blame them?

Disc Priests spend all their time in a shielding frenzy, while Holy Priests relish in their
Circle of Healing. Making it a smart heal was probably Blizzard’s way of making up for their lackluster tank healing. Squishy and soft healing Priests of either type enjoy making the other cloth wearing casters cry by rolling on any Crit and Spellpower gear that drops. But really I do feel bad for them; it must suck to be perpetually stuck in a dress.

Shaman
One of the number one causes of accidental death in a raid situation: A Shaman forgot to recall his totems. Elemental and Enhancement Shamans would be excellent additions to any raid, bring decent DPS, and excellent buffs. Too bad you can’t do either when you are dead. Chain Heal, Chain Heal, Chain Heal pretty much sums up the life of a healing Shaman. I’m not even sure if they really have any other spells. Simply bind all your keys on the keyboard to Chain Heal and you can top the healing meters.

Druid
Tree form is ugly with a capital U. Regrowth, Rejuvenation, and Lifebloom then watch your HoT’s tick down. The game should be equipped with an alarm clock because that is nothing short of a snooze fest. Not to mention that Resto Druids are near impossible to kill. A mobile target with powerful heals that is immune to almost all crowd control, I call hacks.

Moonkin’s are almost as ugly as the trees and they can’t seem to detach themselves from their tree brethren as they insist upon calling upon three treants that run around and generally annoy mobs and players alike. Not to mention the Moonkin dance can effectively distract anyone in viewing distance. It’s like watching a train wreck, you just can’ t look away.

Cat Druids are nothing more than Rogues with renamed abilities in kitten costumes. At least they finally made the kitten costumes cooler. Bear Druids, face it: Warriors and Death Knights have more avoidance abilities than you, you are basically just a giant meat shield the raid is using to distract the boss while they kill him. Sure you hold aggro well, but if someone started jiggling a giant bear butt in front of me, I would be a little upset as well.

Warriors
Death Knights are better tanks than you, and they do it without shields. You don’t have to face pull everything, you are allowed to equip a ranged weapon for a reason. Also, since you have a ranged weapon you should probably make sure you have the proper ammo for it, just because it isn’t your primary weapon doesn’t mean you shouldn’t carry it. DPS Warriors, you would be excellent DPS if you could manage to stay alive for 3.2 seconds. Running in and casting Bladestorm is probably not such a good idea. I do commend you though, as it takes a certain level of skill to die that quickly.

Hunter
Hunters, you have Misdirect and Feign Death for a reason. Use them! And be sure to bring along enough ammunition for the raid, not being able to use your primary weapon is never a good thing. Melee damage is not an appropriate form of damage for a Hunter, go back, and roll a Rogue or other such melee class if it appeals to you. Letting your pet on aggressive might seem like a good idea, but trust me, unless your intent is to kill off the entire raid, it‘s not. While Huntards are really few and far between they have sufficiently given your class a permanent bad name.

Rogues
Probably one of the most replaceable classes. Other melee classes can do more damage than you, and bring more or the same utility to the raid. Hunters are plotting ways to kill you because you steal their gear and with the introduction of Tricks of the Trade you are even further intruding into their niche. Never fear though, if things get tough you can always stealth and watch as the rest of your raid bites the dust.

Death Knights
Blizzard wasn’t going to favor their new hero class right? Wrong! With a brand new buff in the new patch under their belts Death Knights are probably one of the most OP classes currently in game. Death Knight tanks are amazing, and so are their DPSing counterparts. One of my Death Knight friends summed it up nicely when he said “I play by binding half my spells to one side of the keyboard and half to the other side, then I proceed to face roll until I win.”

Paladins
Oh look it’s Captain America casting shield attack! No wait, it’s just a tanking Paladin. Everyone hates you because you can tank and do it well and you know they are jealous of the flashy way you pull. Healing Paladins have huge heals that make them amazing tank healers, never mind that any other healing class is better suited for raid healing, at least no one is competing for your gear. Ret Paladins push out tons of damage and can quickly kill any player that stands in their way. Hammer of Justice, Bubble, and Avenging Wrath all make every player you face off against want to /head desk. Overall a great class to play, as long as you don’t mind being dressed like a Power Ranger.